Change your life

Change your mind, change your life

The picture at the bottom (2007) was taken when I was 19 years old.

I was a mess and I was at an extreme low point in my life.

Let’s just say I like to really scrape the bottom of the barrel when I go deep, thinking maybe there be treasure on the other side, yarr 🏴‍☠️

Back then each day I smoked weed until my eyes would bleed while my mind slowly disintegrated.
I felt completely isolated from the world and that I had nothing to live for.
I felt so worthless that I didn’t see the point of being alive.

I would daydream of how to kill myself.

Maybe eat a lot of pills and overdose?
No, too risky, what if it doesn’t work and I live through it – what would people think of me then? It would seem just like a weak and desperate cry for help.
How about jumping in front of a bus or train? No, that would be terrible for the bus driver and passengers.
I could jump off the balcony, but I might survive that too.
A rope tied to the ceiling, that could maybe do the trick, but it seems like an uncomfortable and horrible way to die.
Is there any way I could drown myself?

Turns out it’s not as easy to kill yourself as you might think – luckily 😳

So here I am 19 years old with a mind that’s trying to kill me. I’m digging a hole for myself and it’s starting to fill from the top down. But I just keep digging. You know, cause maybe there’s treasure down there. Yarr ☠️

One day I’m hanging out with my friend. That day my breakfast and lunch had been a smoke or two, maybe three, which in hindsight probably wasn’t the best diet, because I passed out, hitting face first into the ground, ripping out a chin piercing and cutting open my cheek. The scar remains as a reminder.

My friend was crazy enough to just take photos after waking me up. Which I’m honestly grateful to him for doing so (even if his priorities were a little far out on the creative side) because this picture has since become a strong reminder of the person I used to be and what I’ve gone through 

And when it comes to that transformation, I explained it best to my father when he once asked me what I was doing with my life:

“When your whole house is built on a shitty foundation, all you can do is tear everything down and start over. Maybe move to a nicer neighborhood, while you’re at it.” 🏡

Which I’ve done.

Quite a few times by now to be honest.

Apparently I wasn’t naturally gifted at building a healthy home for myself to live in, but I was stubborn enough to keep going until I figured it out…

And I’m glad to say, that I finally taught myself how to build a strong house on a solid foundation.

How to live a life of meaning and joy 
How to find love in others and in myself too 
How to take care of my health and myself 💪
How to be successful in business and leadership 🎯
How to find peace and happiness no matter what and overcome any challenges, that the universe might throw my way 
How to live an incredible life 🔥

There have been a few minor tweaks to add. A layer of paint here and there. Some boundaries that needed to be established, but I’m glad to say I’ve built an amazing home for myself.
And I’m going to be pimping it up even further as I move forward, maybe make it into a villa with a boss ass swimming pool, just because I can and I have the power to do so.
To create my life exactly as I want it.

We all do.

The picture at the top (2017), my current avatar resonates with my new home 💛

Freedom. Love. Happiness. Beauty. Strength.

Those are the values that shape who I am and what I do. What matters to me. And by changing my mind, I’ve been able to change my life to something even more magnificent than I would have ever dared dream of back when I was 19. It hasn’t been an easy journey, but it’s been worth every single step of the way.

And looking back at everything I’ve learned, the challenges I’ve overcome, the transformation I’ve gone through, I now know that no matter what happens: I’ve got this.
Because despite the complete chaos I lived in, I found a way to master myself.
And even living in a nightmare, I was able to dream my way out of it and build myself a better life.

I transformed the mind trying to kill me into an unstoppable dream machine.

And if I can do it, so can you.
→ Who knows, there might be treasure on the other side, yarr 👑

Now watch me crush it 😎

2017-09-13T10:39:38+00:00

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