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Bury your fucking ego

Why?

Because of the law of requisite variety.

Currently, I’m reading a book on Neuro-Linguistic Programming. If you’ve never heard of NLP, then it’s basically the future of therapy and self-development. This is the stuff that works. It’s a powerful coaching style that helps you grow as a person.

And one of the fundamental laws of NLP is this, the law of requisite variety:

The ability of a person within a system to succeed is directly proportional to the level of flexibility of behaviour that person chooses to exhibit.

Feel free to read that sentence again.

Simply put it means this. Success is based on your ability to adapt. So if you want to succeed in anything in your life, then bury your fucking ego and grow!

But what’s the ego?

It’s not who you are, but it’s your self-image. It’s how you see yourself. It’s your thinking about yourself. Your social mask. The illusion you carry of yourself. As Buddhism would explain it:

We don’t see ourselves as we really are, we see ourselves as a reflection in the water.

So stop looking at the water. Stop staring at your reflection. Bury your fucking ego and reinvent yourself if you’re not happy with your current illusion.

Which just so happens to be my area of expertise…

 

 


 

Reinvention.

Changing my lifestyle.

Changing my name.

Changing my mind.

And I’m so damn happy that I’ve been good at doing that, because it’s taken me on a journey from this little unhappy 15-year kid, who’d been rejected, bullied and had the life beaten out of me both physically and mentally – in school and at home. I was lucky enough to find a good mentor at my boarding school, my roommate Mads who showed so much patience with me in the year we lived together and helped me grow into a better person than the angry kid that I used to be.

Just 15 years old and already a lady-killer…

And later on, when I was falling apart again because I didn’t know what to do with my life, when my life was filled with drugs, drinking and depression, I ended up looking like this. Actually not just looking like this, but feeling like this. At the age of 19, this was my mental state and if I hadn’t been able to reinvent myself, I would have been stuck there for the rest of my life.

19 years old and still a lady-killer!

 


 

Success is based on your ability to adapt.

Improvise, Adapt and Overcome – a slogan used by the Marine Corps.

That’s what I’ve become in my life. Ever changing, ever adapting, growing, becoming something new and it all starts with one simple premise: bury your fucking ego.

So let me ask you, what are you stuck in?

In Denmark, I think it’s the Law of Jante.

Don’t think you’re special. Don’t think you’ve got something we don’t have. Don’t think you know anything, that we don’t know”

Which is a great tool for keeping everyone equal, and it’s an amazing tool for killing off progress and ambition. Now if you ask me, then this is rooted in egos that are so fragile, that they can’t deal with anyone or anything reminding them, that they could be getting more out of their lives and just aren’t taking responsiblity.
At least that’s how I used to feel and why I used to hold other people back – this fear of my own inadequacy…

But let me tell you, the truth is that someone is smarter than you. Someone is stronger than you. Someone looks better than you do and someone has a bigger dick than you do. Get over it.

There’s 7.5 billion people on the planet – do you really think no one has anything to teach you?

Success is based on your ability to adapt.

So bury your fucking ego and grow.

I’ve always found Tyler Durden to be a healthy rolemodel for self-development and growth

 


 

Now what’s the flipside of being a master of reinvention?

There’s a heavy price to pay for always growing and improving as a person, for striving to get the most out of life. And that price is that friendships don’t last long. I’ve lost a lot of people on my journey through life. In fact most of the people in my life right now have been there for less than a year and if you asked them if they recognize me from who I was when they first met me, they’d probably say no.

When you’re constantly growing and seeking to improve your life, it’s rare to find friends who can keep up or aren’t going to try and hold you back when you start to move ahead. In fact I’ve only got one friend, who’s been with me since the beginning. My best mate all the way back from kindergarten, Chris.

And how did he get to stay?

Well, if you ask me, it’s because he’s probably on the same journey in life. Always wanting the most out of life for himself, his family and those closest to him. He celebrates the success of others and he nourishes any growth in the people closest to him.

He doesn’t care if someone is better at him in something, to him, it’s more important that they succeed in life what their dreams and their potential. How’s he able to do that?

Because he’s buried his fucking ego.

And to me, that’s fucking love. When you care less about yourself than you do about the other person, that’s love. And I just hope I’ve been able to do the same in return.

 


 

Cause the truth is I’ve got a damn big ego.

It’s massive. The biggest. Huuuuge.

My ego is so large in fact, that I imagine people are going to find my thoughts interesting enough to read and even more so that my words will inspire them to action and want to improve their lives. That’s a fucking big ego.

My ego is so big it’s got its own state currency.

But.

I’m open-minded, I don’t judge, I take responsibility for everything in my life, I don’t blame others for or complain about my life, I am vulnerable and open to the world, I’ve let every type of person into my life, I’m curious about anyone and anything. When I was 15 years old coming from the small village town, I was full of prejudice and hate, I’d been taught racism and stereotyping – and I didn’t even realize it until one of my classmates slapped me for making a particularly racist remark about him. I didn’t know any better, but it taught me one very important thing:

Just because I think it’s true, doesn’t make it true. I’m not always right and I don’t know everything. In fact, I’m probably a fucking fool when it comes to a lot of things in life and I better open up my mind and start learning about the real world, if I want to be successful.

Have you ever had an eye-opener like that? Did someone ever slap you for some of the shit you walk around saying or thinking – because if they didn’t, then allow me the honor of doing so.

  • Who are you judging?
  • What are you complaining about?
  • Why aren’t you as happy, fulfilled and successful in your life as you’d hoped and dreamed for?

Bury your fucking ego.

You might argue that my t-shirt is making a strong statement: “Be original or die” – but it’s actually just another fact of life.

 


 

And once you’ve done that, then there’s good news for you.

Because there is one thing that you are better at than anyone else.

Yup, that’s right!

There’s one thing that you can do better than the 7.5 billion other people in the world!

There’s one thing, that nobody can do as well as you can do it…

And I mean no one.

You ready for it?

The one thing you can do better than anyone else on this whole damn planet…

That only you can do!

Is: being you.

Nobody does it better than you!

And that’s amazing! Because inside of you there is an original, there is someone who is truly unique, there’s a loving, caring and awesome person. There’s a person who dreams about a good life, who wants to do something that no one else wants to do and there’s a potential there for something new and fantastic. And personally, I’d love to see that!

I want to see the real you and I’ll celebrate with you when you’ve found the way to be yourself truly, but if you’re going to show it, then you need to do one thing…

Bury your fucking ego.

Because it’s holding you back. It’s limiting you. The beliefs that have been put onto you, the prejudices, the stereotyping, the hate, the anger, the hurt, the self-entitlement and the selfishness that exists in the ego. It’s holding you back. It’s not who you really are. It’s what a friend once told me “Aren’t you just a rose covered in shit.” – I was. And then I buried my fucking ego, I tore down my walls, I questioned my beliefs and my thoughts, I changed my lifestyle, my name and my mind. I buried my fucking ego.

It’s the law of requisite variety.

Success is based on your ability to adapt.

Now is there somewhere in your life that you need to adapt?

 

Good luck being a hero 😉

2017-03-12T21:40:33+00:00

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